Do you think football is

• boring
• just an excuse to watch grown men fight
• stupid
• pointless
• trivial ?

You're not alone ! Welcome to ...

The Anti-football page

Definitions of football

Makes watching grass grow look exciting

Things I'd rather do than watch football

• Wash the dishes

Anti-football jokes

Q: What is the difference between cricket and football ?
A: Football is slightly MORE interesting than watching grass grow.

Q: What is the difference between bashing your head against a brick wall and listening to talk about football ?
A: No difference. They're both great when they stop.

Q: What do you call a bunch of football fans with laryngitis (loss of voice) ?
A #1: A big improvement.
A #2: Noise pollution under control.

Q: How do you make a football telecast interesting ?
A: Turn down the sound.
Q: How do you make a football telecast MORE interesting ?
A: Turn down the picture as well.
Q: And if you want it more interesting still ?
A: Change the channel, or turn the TV off.

Q: What's the difference between a fanatic and a bore ?
A: A fanatic* is someone who can't change their mind and won't change the subject. A bore is someone whose chosen subject is football.
(*Acknowedgement to Winston Churchill for famous quote)

Links

www.footballkills.org

http://www.sportssuck.org

Tom's Anti-Football

Your link here.

Any good anti-football stuff you'd like to add ? Let me know, and I'll put it on this page, to give warmth and solace to the millions trying to survive life surrounded by sport-mad relatives/friends/colleagues.

Anyone who wishes to copy this format for any other kind of anti-sport page, be my guest !

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