A successful man is one who can make more money than his wife can spend…. A successful woman in one who can find that man!
Two blondes are walking along when they hear……
"Psst! Down hear!”
They look down and see a frog sitting beside the road. The frog says,
”Hey, if you girls kiss me I’ll turn into a world famous drummer and make you both rich and famous!”
The two girls look at each other, and one of them reaches down and grabs the frog and stuffs it in her pocket.The other girl says,
“What did you do that for?”
The first replies,
“I’m not stupid. I know a talking frog is worth heaps more than a famous drummer any day!”
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD. “Growing old is mandatory..growing up is optional.” “Insanity is my only mans of relaxation!”. “Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.” “You know you are getting old when you stoop down to tie your shoes and wonder what else you can do while your down there.” “I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart.” “Time may be a great healer, but it’s also a lousy beautician.” “Age does not always bring wisdom. Sometimes it comes alone.” “Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but it can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate mud cake.”
You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
