

The Mermaid of Broken Bay. Painting by Roy Spence Poem by Dave Dallwitz
Dave Dallwitz self portrait 1953

MERMAIDS
Mermaids,I adore them,
Seductive, soft and clinging,
Their silken hair so long and fair,
Their tails so gently swinging.They’re smooth up top,but from the waist
Their shiny scales do glisten;
Beneath the moon they gently croon-
You’ll hear them if you listen.Oh how I’d like to catch one-
I’d keep her in a tank;
I’d never take her shopping
Or on visits to the bank.
But she’d serve behind the bar-
Her tail would not intrude,
And nowadays in bars, bare breasts
Are not considered rude.But I guess she’d grow homesick:
There’d come a day, alack,
When sadly, and with heavy heart,
I’d have to throw her back.
(From LANDSCAPES OF THE MIND by Dave Dallwitz)

Variation on foreign expressions:
HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS:Can you drive a French motorcycle?
IDIOS AMIGOS: We’re wild and crazy guys
RIGOR MORRIS: The cat is dead.
RESPNDEZ S’IL VOUCE PLAID:Honk if you’re Scottish.
QUE SERA SERF: Life is feudal.
LE ROI EST MORT. JIVE LE ROI:The King is dead. No kidding.
POSH MORTEM: Death styles of the rich and famous.
MONAGE A TROIS: I am three years old.
FELIX NAVIDAD: Our cat has a boat.
VENI, VIDI, VICE: I came, I saw,I partied.
COGITO ERGO SPUD: I think; therefore I Yam.
QUIP PRO QUOA: Fast retort.ON: Tons of luck.
ALOHA OY: Love: greetings,farewell; from such pain you would never ow.
VENI,VIDI,VELCRO: I came, I saw, I stuck around.
ZITGEIST: The Clearasil doesn’t cover it up.