My fellow Aussies continue to flame me about this website. Tristan took umbrage at the Microsoft Windaz 2000 page. Believing that I was some racist Aussie-hating American he penned this interesting diatribe:
TR: FIRSTLY, your site gives the impression that you regard pc users as pro-gates idiots,
LB: Hmmmm..... I'm not sure how you got that impression!
Actually, I feel great compassion for those who have to use them. I have to use them at my work, but that does not make me a pro-gates idiot. (or maybe it does)
TR: and mac users as simply wonderful human beings.
LB: Much happier individuals might be a better description.
TR: we both know the cost difference btwn macs & pc's, so if u'r implying one's ability to afford a mac is a reflection of their personal integrity
LB: Personal integrity? Wow, I never thought of that one. Can I quote you?
TR: you clearly have rocks in yr head,
LB: Apparently so.... for replying to emails like your's.
TR: and as for linux, some of us simply haven't the time to make it work for ourselves..
LB: Me. too.
TR: that's just the way life is. also, are you suggesting the people behind macintosh (& hence iPod) are saints?
LB: My opinion of iPod is lower than that of Windows, actually. They don't seem to withstand being dropped down the toilet very well, but then neither do mobile phones.
TR: are you completely insane?!
LB: Many would argue that this is the case.
TR: SECONDLY, are u a fucking racist??
LB: No, and is that sort of language really required for you to express your opinion to a complete stranger.
TR: i am australian.
LB: So am I, but I also know when and when not to use capitals.
TR: i never use the word 'youse' & know very few people indeed who do, in fact i think you'll find that the accent/speech implied by your site's so-called humour is largely confined to a small margin of our population, dwelling mostly in rural areas. as for 'adding thingamybob', this is just plainly insulting, not to mention ignorant;
LB: You don't have to go out to the rural areas to hear people talk like that. If you live in Sydney, try anywhere west of Parramatta, if you ever decide to take a trip away the North Shore or the Eastern Suburbs. Bogans, I believe, is the term that is used to describe them... checked flannelette shirts, mullet haircuts, bad attitude, don't like smart-arse know-it-alls, just in case in you ever find yourself in the back streets of Mt Druitt late one night, it might be an idea to speak to them in their own language, examples of which I kindly supplied on the website. That page could save your life!
TR: speaking as an informed individual, i feel you should know that australia is home to some of the world's leading astronomers, mathematicians and experimental physicists, not to mention a super-abundance of programmers & geeks.
LB: I know that, being an informed individual with post-graduate qualifications. And many of my clients use words like "youse" and "thingamybob". I don't think any less of them for speaking like that.
TR: you should perhaps also consider what the world at large tends to think of americans ie a gene-pool with an over-populated shallow end, as well as an ignorant consumer wasteland! try some bill hicks on for size.
LB: So, whose being racist now?
TR: so do yrself the favour of avoiding bigotry and inappropriate insults, else you may forfeit potential supporters (of which there are plenty here)... all because you can't resist the urge to be a racist fuckwit! get the rocks OUT of yr head; the possibility for collaboration is just too important.
LB: I didn't create the content or images on that Aussie page, I found it somewhere else, copied it, without permission of course, and put it of my website. I don't know who wrote, but I suspect it was an Aussie with a sense of humour. I always thought Aussies had the ability to laugh at themselves. Not everyone apparently.
There seems to have been one word that you overlooked on the website and that is the word "JOKE".
TR: now that i've got that off my chest, pls, feel free to correspond.
LB: If you are game, Tristan. (Oh, by the way, how is Isolde?)
| F u c k o f f. I am witening this in Outlook Expres and I will not change it. F u c k e r Happy Win XP, IE 6, Office 97, Visual Studio 6.0 user. Heil Hitler (that is greeting of the Linux f u c k e r s) |
Bill Gates will be pleased that he has at least one intellectual giant with a real way with words among his fans. A very cerebral critique of my website. BTW, I notice that you still use Office 97. The upgrades are at bit expensive, are they? Keep Micro$oft rich! |
| Your Jealousy, strong case of
tall poppy syndrome and severe lack of a life is astounding.
If you don't like Gates, invent something more popular than his
creations and beat him in business. If you are too weak to do
that, by all means continue to implore people to boycott his
products but leave the cheap and low personal shots to other
mindless minions who have nothing better to do than defame people.
It may make you feel better but you lower any semblance of respectability
you purport to have. Have a nice day, Tom (a happy customer) :-) |
Thanks for the comments, Tom. It is of interest that most of the rare abuse that I get is from fellow Australians and not from Americans who you might imagine would support Gates. I always thought that Australians had a good sense of humour, but I seem to have been mistaken on that count. You were one of two aussies that have had a shot a me today. Please be reminded that it is a Microsoft ***JOKE*** Page and not meant to be taken all that seriously. I have no intention of trying to emulate him and invent anything. If I did, eg, a cure for cancer, I would gladly give it to the world for free rather than become a billionaire with the morals of Gates. |
| Looks to me like you're just another loser, envious of someone else's success. Can't you find anything constructive to do? |
I can only guess that you are referring to my Microsoft/Bill Gates Joke Page rather than just giving me gratutitous abuse for the heck of it. Microsoft ***JOKE*** Page and not meant to be taken all that seriously. I have obviously been mistaken that giving people a few laughs was something constructive. Sorry about that. BTW, I do a lot of other constructive things in my life, but I guess you would not be interested in that. |
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jealousy is not a nice character trait [I emailed back asking for an explanation. I guessed that it had something to do with my Microsoft Page, but want to clarify that. This was his response.] Re: explanation Mr. Brash its in regards to the Bill Gates web page you have I think the world needs more understanding and kinder people who think about what they say before criticising others . use me as an example just be nice not jealous! we all work hard to achieve something in our lives and we strive to keep what we achieve,dont we ? think about it i have |
Oh, the Bill Gates ***JOKE*** Page. I was wondered what I had done to upset you. I host a number of websites; Bill's is just one of them. Hey, its supposed to be a Joke page not a serious critique of the man. It is meant to amuse. It is really very tongue in cheek. One thing surprises me is that my most vocal critics have been fellow Australians. You are at least the 4th aussie to bag it. The yanks love it and I get lots of nice mail from them. What should we make of that? Do they know and understand him so well that they love to hate him? Do we aussies fail to understand the power and danger of Microsoft? I don't know. I was hoping Bill might drop into the website while he was in Australia for the Olympic Games. So far, he has not. I wonder what he would think of it. Anyway, I am not jealous of Bill. I am fairly successful in my own work not to feel jealous of his billions (OK, well just a bit, maybe). |
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piss off no hope asshole [I can't find my reply to this bit of childish abuse. Basically, I asked him what it was about. My guess it was the Bill Gates Page. He did not have to guts to reply.] |
RE: http://www.ozemail.com.au/~lbrash/msjokes/index.html [This was from someone saying they were the webmaster of my ISP, Ozemail. I almost fell for this joke, but after starting to write an angry reply, I decided that he was obvously joking and I never sent it.] |
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This person was really upset by this website. Here is my reply: Subject: Re: stupidity, arrogance, and filth are yours!!!! Having opened the msjokes, as a Newbie, let me say I was apalled at the trash you consider wise, intelligent and of value. This we do not need in our society. Well, thank you for taking the time to express your opinion about my Microsoft & Bill Gates Jokes Page. While I do not agree with your opinion, you have ever right to hold it, just as I have the right to reply and defend my position. Let's look at your comments: I was apalled (sic) at the trash you consider wise, intelligent and of value. It appears that you missed the point of the page. In no way do I consider it wise and intelligent, it is what it says, a ***JOKES*** page. It is a collection of satirical stories and jokes, gleaned from various parts of the Internet about a man and his monopoly. If you wish to call it "trash", that is your right, but I believe that many of the stories are so obvious tongue-in-cheek and quite witty. BTW, "appalled" is usually spelt with 2 p's Stupidity, arrogance and filth are yours Strong words! Stupidity? Well, OK, that is in the eye of the beholder. I disagree. I believe that there is a lot of clever stories on the page. Arrogance? Definitely not. If anyone is arrogant, it is Bill Gates, his attitude and his power mongering. Filth? There is very little, if anything that most people would consider obscene or filthy on the page. If there are some specific things that you consider obscene, could you let me know and I would be prepare to change it for those of delicate sensibilities. |
I am having doubts about how much of my page that you actually
read. as a newbie As a newbie, you are yet to find out the power of Bill Gates' increasing monopoly of the computer industry and the Internet. This we do not need in our society. Now this comment really worried me and said a lot about you. I have tried, so far, not to attack you personally, but this comment sorely tempts me. Are you saying that there is no place in society for people with views that differ to some arbitarily-decided "normal" view of the world? Are you saying that one should never criticise, even in jest, the rich and powerful? Are you saying that we should mindless accept, without comment, large monopolies and their control over OUR society? Did you know that quite a lot of people agree with my views and actually wrote to me saying that they enjoyed the page? Are you suggesting that those with dissident views. like me, be the first up against the wall, come the revolution? Is this Communist China or Nazi Germany? Oh, dear! I AM getting carried away. Look, my Microsoft & Bill Gates Jokes Page is there purely to entertain and it is unfortunate that you seem to lack the sense of humour to appreciate that fact. I am not expecting everyone to agree with me and I occasionally get people who flame me in good natured way, but not in the aggressive way that you have. Have a nice day! |
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The next one is not really a flame, but certainly deserves special mention. How about going easy on us folks forced to use IE by our
This is a terrible state of affairs!! How can any employer be so cruel!! Take industrial action straight away!! Demand: "Netscape Now!". "No inferior substitutes!" Make placards: "Bill Gates is ruining our jobs!", "We demand proper browsers!", "MSIE is crap!" Picket your employer's office!! |
Chant: "What do we want?" "NETSCAPE!" "When do we want it?" "NOW!!" Throw more cream pies at Bill Gates and any other Microsoft official that visits your office. Oh oh!!, I just realised, maybe you work for Microsoft! In that case, go meekly back to your office and reinstall Windows 95 and MSIE and get on with it. -- |
Follow Bill's smiling face to move from page to page.
Larry Brash's Microsoft & Bill Gates Joke Page.
