David Rabbitborough's A to Z of Australian Species

 

THE ORGANISER

Most species have their own social groups and mark out their own territory in which to live. However there is one creature that seems to exist in all territories. It can be encountered in almost any environment in Australia where at any time it can suddenly leap out to trap the unwary, and its name is the Organiser.

The organiser is hard to pick because it has no external signs, it tends to blend into its surroundings until it senses what is called a Cause and then it springs into action. Organisers will organise anything, raffles, office parties, surprise parties, fetes, dances, art festivals, awards nights even Olympic Games, Bicentennials and Millenials. They exist in equal numbers at both ends of the political spectrum as they are just as happy teeing up a street march as a scone baking competition.

Organisers also show no mercy, and no one is safe once they have a raffle book or a list of jobs to be done in their hands and if one encounters one on a bus one will end up singing all the way to Cairns. They are also psychologically indestructible. No matter how great a debacle the function was last time, they will bounce back into action again, feeling that they learnt from their mistakes and determined that the next event will be the biggest and the best.

Even after total catastrophes they will simply lie dormant for a while until another cause rears its head. Thus most species have learnt to always be on the look out for Organisers and have an excuse ready in case they strike. One way of detecting organisers is that although they themselves have no distinguishing features, they are recognisable by their mates which always bear an expression of great fatigue.

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