Articles

For the last couple of years I have been writing a regular column for the Glasshousse Country News. Included here are some of those articles.

A Smile To a Stranger

We are a quarter of the way through the year, how are the resolutions holding up? Starting to see results or are you planning for next years resolutions?

Change seems always to be difficult. We tend to hold on to what we know instead of stepping out into the unknown. We haven't always been scared to change. As children life was new and exciting and we crashed and bashed our way into this brave new world. At some point we decided to start believing it was hard or so much trouble and began the capitulation into mediocrity. Einstein said "Great Spirits have always met violent opposition from mediocre minds" The problem is it's our own inner voice, not always someone else's.

Whether it's depression or a physical illness our own attitudes and beliefs govern the healing process. Einstein also stated that "problems are never solved at the level they were created". There is a multitude of examples of people overcoming enormous physical, mental or emotional handicaps to heal themselves.

The key factor, I believe is willingness. From curing oneself of cancer to improving our financial situation willingness holds the key to success. It is about giving up our victim hood and accepting our ability to make a difference.

A smile to a stranger is suicide prevention. This is a fine example of how each and every one of us makes a difference each day. By simply smiling and being pleasant we may be making the difference that reduces the high suicide rate in this country. It can be that simple. It takes more energy to be a grumpy old so and so than it does to be happy and cheerful. We make a difference' it is important to recognize that fact.  A local business recently engaged me to lecture to their staff. Several days later the owner informed me of the noticeable changes that occurred with her staff. It made a difference!

Recently I was in a shopping centre and I walked up to a lady and thanked her for smiling. Her faced beamed with delight. Of all the people in that centre she was the only one smiling.

At any moment we can change, but which moment will we choose?

Wayne can be contacted at Glasshouse Kinesiology ph. 0407 742 110 or glaskin@ozemail.com.au

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Accountability

Many years ago my cattle dog bit a little girl. I panicked working out where I could hide him so he would not be put down. Sound familiar, ever covered up for a loved one or a mate.

Finally I decided to grow up and be accountable. Going down the road I approached the little girls mother and took responsibility for allowing my dog to get out. She thanked me and pointed out that she little girl should not have gone out and cuddled the dog. Fortunately it was a small graze and no damage was done and my dog wasn’t reported.

The most powerful lesson for me was to be accountable for my actions. It wasn't my fault the little girl cuddled my grumpy old cattle dog. It was my responsibility to keep him constrained. That lesson has had a powerful influence in my life.

What does this have to do with health? Quiet a lot actually. Only we can be responsible for our lifestyles and the decisions we make.

Another powerful lesson has been about the choices we make. We live in a polar world of Love or Fear. Imagine three boxes. The first is the Choice box. No choice is a choice so it lives here too. Under this are the other two boxes; one is called FEAR the other LOVE. Now imagine a pipeline coming from the choice box then splitting into the other two.

In life we choice love or fear. It's easy to recognise the big fears. It takes diligence and courage to recognise the hidden fears and very one has them. Don’t delude yourself, we all have them and unrecognised they rule our lives.

Over the last few years I have noticed an interesting thing happens when people recognise and own their fears. They don't go away or "we don’t get over them'. What occurs is that we see the influence these negative effects have and better manage them.

An example. Coming back from Birdsville I thought I had left one of my tripods behind. I found myself getting angry and bashing myself up. Catching myself in a classic case of self-abuse I stopped and stared saying to myself "I love being an idiot" over and over as I drove along. I know its sounds crazy. The idea behind it is I’m moving the idea from the fear box to the love box.

After playing with the statement for a few minutes, out came "I love being a Useless Idiot". I had recognised my idiot pattern before but "Useless" was a revelation. That statement has had a profound effect in my life. I had until that moment never recognised the power that belief had. I started to recognise why I reacted in certain situations. That simple discovery has changed my life for the better. 

Willingness and honesty were the two main ingredients help remove this negative block. It is that easy, so next time you are stuck, Love the problem to find the solution.

 In closing thank you to all of you for reading this column and I hope offering a different view on things has helped you discover just how wonderful you are.

To quote a verse from Disiderata "You are child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars. You have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you the universe is unfolding as it should."

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Willing to Learn

Over the years I have been working with people, I have gone through my own personal growth in my thinking and ideas. When I first started out in Kinesiology I thought it was a load of rubbish, just another scam. I remember getting on the table when a pre-eminent New Zealand kinesiologist was giving a demonstration,. He did, what to me back in 1989 was a whole lot of mumbo jumbo. After his demonstration I felt no different. I didn’t want to be rude but was just about convinced I had witnessed a clever scam.

The demonstration was in Taree on the NSW mid coast and afterwards I drove back to Newcastle. Half way home I noticed something odd, my right foot was resting straight on the accelerator. For as long as I can remember I had always driven with my foot leaning to the right.  I realized at that moment that the practitioner had in fact created a physical change in my hip structure and alignment. What made this even more fascinating is that he did not physically work on my pelvis or hips. In fact he did not do any physical work. What he did was uncover some hidden emotional and mental patterns I had been carrying from a child.

I went about testing what I had learned from that first kinesiology experience. What still amazes me to this day is how powerful a tool the human mind is. We can use it to make ourselves sick or we can use it to make ourselves healthy. We can achieve insurmountable obstacles, or we can be brought to our knees by the slightest hurdle.

Knowing how powerful the mind is, has guided the way I work with people since that fateful day back in 1989. Many may think that "changing a person’s thinking will change their lives" is a load of mumbo jumbo. I understand their thinking, but in my reality, based my own personal experience and from the people I have worked with, the moment they change their fear based thinking their lives begin to change.

By being willing to admit I was wrong I gained a fantastic opportunity to expand my ideas and beliefs and be exposed to some amazing life changing situations.

Be prepared to take a risk and grow.

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Making a Difference

Anton Szilasi is an inspirational young man who is currently on his way to Kashijharia, India to install solar power to for a local medical centre. The project will benefit the whole community as well as provide clean water and solar powered cooking. What makes this story fascinating is that Anton applied to many aid agencies and was refused because of his age, he is sixteen years old. Undaunted Anton contacted CARE and found out about the clinic. Using his own money and donations he is currently on his way to India to install the Solar Power at no cost to the centre.

With the silly season nearly here many of us are beginning to consider our New Years Resolution. How many of us think beyond ourselves as Anton is doing and look at how our actions can better those around us? We spend outrageous amounts on trivia and doodads at Christmas and miss the real point. Does that sum up our lives in general, we spend large amounts of time and energy on things we do not want or need instead of taking some time to look at what is really valuable. How often have we seen children have more fun with a box or wrapping than the present?

The hottest video doing the rounds at the moment is "The Secret". Its core message is we create our own reality, a message a portion of society still choices not to recognize. Anton is creating his own reality by making a difference. How about you, are you making a difference or just making more of a mess in your life and pretending you are OK?

This year when we look at our goals for 2007 and beyond it might be time to do it differently. Look at the bigger picture of how your choices can make the world a better place. The Power within each one of us is profound. I read recently that each action we take ripples forward in time seven generations. Ponder that concept for a moment. Evil prospers while good men do nothing. If we do nothing about the fear and greed we pay homage to each day in our own lives it will be projected onto our children - seven generations from now. It is a sobering thought. I appreciate that the majority of people believe that they can't make a difference, but this is the greatest lie perpetrated on the human race. Each and every one of us makes a difference, positively or negatively. There is no escaping this fundamental truth.

So do we take a leaf out of the book of a sixteen year old and get out there and do something amazing and shine like the true talents we are, or cower under our fears and limitations and support the corruption of the human spirit?

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Forgiveness

The courage, dignity and beauty of spirit of the Amish community is a glowing example of the beauty of the human spirit when it is cultivated and nurtured. To be able to forgive and invite the wife of the man who slaughtered their children into their community is a signpost for the rest of us. Some may put it down to their religious beliefs; personally I think it's more than that.

These people are healthy in mind-body-spirit. They are complete, something most of us no longer understand or can fathom. They maintain in their daily lives the beliefs in common decency, integrity and respect.

Their courage made me begin to ponder the concept, "What does it mean to be healthy?" What defines a healthy person? Looking around at our current society is it a hard question to answer. Our society is sick; we have lost the qualities we like to brag about. Societies become sick because people corrupt the core values of healthy living, dignity, respect, integrity and common decency.

We tend to think of health as a physical condition. Surely it is much more; it must include our mind-body-spirit. We overeat; consume drugs in their many forms. Some exercise their bodies and ignore their minds. In fear people turn to religion and starve their spirits. Greatness comes from doing the ordinary things with perfection. Having mind-body-spirit harnessed together is the secret.

Health is more than looking good, or running fast, it's about being whole, being a constructive member of a community. It's about helping a mate, even the ones you don't know.

Health is recognizing we are citizens of the Solar System, with a responsibility to do the right things by all.

Maybe it's time we all took off our glasses and had a look at the unhealthy mess we have created and do something about it. It's not so difficult, take the time to drink some water, eat some organic fruit, and breathe. Take a walk, go for a bike ride. Get help with your addiction, or your abusive behaviour. Start communicating with a real person. Say hello and be daring; try a smile.

Finding our healthy mind-body-spirit might even turn out to better than we imagined. TOP

The Art of Deception

We humans are an amazing species with our ability to problem solve and create solutions. One of the most imaginative products is what you might call a stress reduction device. I was impressed with the lengths some people will go for the sake of their fellow man by producing this clever and useful product.

Of what do I refer? I am referring to the cardboard cigarette packets that slip over the disturbing and tasteless health warnings on the real packet. Good heavens we can't have people exposed to reality. No, it is better to buy a dummy packet and bury the problem (No pun intended).

I stood in amazement when I realized what the product on the counter could be used for.

Imagine if the same drive and effort had gone into assisting smokers and other addicts to realize that are incredibly special and unique individuals that play an important part in this world?

Imagine if the same drive and enthusiasm had gone into educating our teachers and parents to built true inner strength and confidence in or children?

Imagine what would happen if tomorrow you woke up and found you had a conscious and could no longer contribute the exploitation of our your fellow travelers on space ship earth?

One small action can have profound affects on those around us. One company making dummy ciggy packs can assist many people to a slow painful death. One company or organization confronting us with global injustices can save thousands. Steve Irwin was a fine example of how one person can make a profound positive difference.

When you get out of bed tomorrow will be just another willing foot soldier for the dark lords of fear or will you suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortunes and take arms against a sea of trouble. Will YOU make the constructive difference.

Smokers, like all other people with negative beliefs are not bad people; they simply do not see how valuable they are!

I had a student thank me after the class recently for my tough love approach during a demonstration. She was stuck in apathy and needed a little kick up the **.. He didn"t like me at the time, and quickly forgave me when the penny dropped.

This column is your kick up the ***.... please don't wait for the next message; it's delivered in a Mack truck, usually in the form of being metaphorically run over.

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Attitude of Gratitude

Driving to Byron Bay the other day a semi trailer was blocking a lane and holding up traffic. Instead of getting angry and annoyed I tried something different. I used the time to chat with Maree about things we would like to do while in Byron.

When we finally passed the semi I smiled, the truckie had stopped to help a young mum with young children who had a flat tyre on a dangerous corner. The truckie’s action made me think about all the little things everyday we could choose to focus on. The smile from a stranger, someone holding a door open, someone saying thank you. Little things really, but when added up I believe we experience more nice interactions each day than we than unpleasant.

I'm sure that stranded mum was pretty grateful for her knight in a truckies singlet. I know I appreciated the fact that decent respectful people still exist and have the courage so show it. How many other people that day were touched by that one act of kindness? It is so easy to overlook that man's actions and focus on the next soap-opera drama so we can have our next adrenal hit. Our addiction to the negative blinds us to the wonderful events occurring around us. I suspect that many people choose to only see the negative to cover up their own guilt and inadequacies for believing they lack the courage and self respect to do the right thing. I would suggest many people continue to live in a fantasy world believing they can not make a difference. Every single action we take makes a difference. That truck driver made a difference as did every one who drove past that stranded mum before he turned up.

Everyday on this planet ordinary people do extraordinary acts of decency. Our volunteer firefighters put their lives on the line as do the SES volunteers. Meals and other services are provided by decent caring people day in day out.

How about for 2007 each one of us adopts an attitude of gratitude? Be grateful for everything in your life.

The last few months of 2006 were personally tough and in hindsight I am extremely grateful for all of it. What came out of my dark night of the soul was a much stronger conviction in what I choose to experience in my life. From the negatives I gained an unshakable belief in the positive that surrounds me everyday. Without fail every time I was struggling someone would appear to remind me this is a beautiful world and we all have our part to play.

Einstein said "Great spirits have always met violent opposition from mediocre minds".

Is your great spirit suffocating under your mediocre mind? Maybe it"s time for an attitude of gratitude?

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Golf like Life is all in the Mind

Would you like to improve your golf game? Let me share with you the secret to golf success. Change your mind. It is that simple. Stop focusing on the negatives and start focusing on the way you want to play.

When you look down the fairway and see sand traps both sides of the green, what do you focus on? I bet you focus on not putting your ball into the bunkers. That is an example of focusing on what you do not want. Next time focus on the green; visualize the ball going onto the green. It is what all pros do. There other trick is they never ever focus on what went wrong. Even if a hit a shocker they imagine they hit a great shot and focus on the next shot. They pay no attention to the past error. If each player reading this applied their minds to their golf games they would make changes almost immediately. If their game doesn’t improve they have not applied enough mental creativity.

When you come to a water trap do you take out your old ball, just in case? You have programmed yourself to hit the ball into the water. Next time take out a good ball and visualize the ball on the green and do not focus on the water.

Several years ago I was presenting a lecture in a small country town; the venue was a golf club. The local pro volunteered to help me with a demonstration. He said he hit the ball 170m. After a simply exercise he felt he was now able to hit the ball 220m. All I did was give him a simply integration exercise. His whole action was more fluid and comfortable.

Golf, like life, is a game of the mind. If you are not in the driver seat and directing your thoughts you will lose. There are no ifs or buts. If you focus on what you do not want you will always get more of what you do not want.

While a certain level of physical skill is necessary it is the mental skill that makes the real difference. Whether it’s golf, soccer, footy or any other sport, simple integration exercises to get the whole body working as a whole unit combined with the mental creativity and the ability to previsulise makes us all better at our chosen sport.

Improve your golf game by first playing the course in your head, then go out and play. To improve your life focus on what you really want and never give up on the dream. Commitment is what makes dreams come true, whether it's golf or life

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Loving your Way to Health, Wealth and Happiness

Change can be a lot easier if we stop doing battle with ourselves and simply start to love ourselves as a whole person Yes, that does mean loving and accepting our shadow side or all those things we don't like about ourselves.

Let me give you an example, late 2005 we were on our way back from the annual Birdsville Races and I thought I had left my tripod at the camp site. I felt myself getting angry and internally beating myself up. I began saying out loud as we drove across the desert "I love feeling like an idiot" It was true inside that was exactly what I was thinking. With passion and gusto I played out my idiot pattern then out came "I love feeling like a useless idiot" This absolutely floored me. It was if every ounce of energy in my body evaporated.

The realization of just how ingrained and powerful that belief was hit me. There was no running from it, there it was, in my face. I continued saying it out load and my energy began to lift. I started feeling different, stronger and less controlled or afraid of the statement.

That event has been a key factor in helping me change. I knew about the old "idiot" pattern, believing I was useless had gone unrecognised.

Now here is an interesting twist, recently I was standing in a framers trying to decide on what frames to use for an upcoming photographic exhibition. I couldn't make a decision, I stood there terrified as Maree chose the frames. It took me until half way through the next day to realise my "useless" pattern had resurfaced. Literally as I recognised it my energy lifted and I felt happier. I knew what was happening and knew I could control the old belief. Simply recognising I was re-acting to an old pattern allowed me to start responding appropriately.

Simply saying "I love .............." whenever we feel negative puts us into problem solving mode and our mind goes about indentifying the culprit and bringing it the surface to be dealt with in a positive way.

The tripod was in the car all the time, I had packed it under some other gear :-))

For your copy of Simply Love It

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Copyright 1998-2007 Wayne Ellis Updated10/04/2007