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Motley Crue The End
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Prayers for the Blessed Vol.2 by Sixx: A.M.

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Motley Crue's Carnival of Sins
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Motley Crue - The Dirt

Chronological Crue is proud to share these emotion stirring memoirs with Crüeheads every month, of an extraordinary relationship that grew between a special young fan and the Crüe's engine room, Nikki Sixx. Come on the journey with us, as every month we chronologically re-visit the meeting and treating, the tears and the fears, the inspiration and dedication, of this unique perspective on life, Crüe and fate. These chapters are written and contributed under her preferred alias of Angel Aderhold.

Chapter 3 - Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll - September 2000.

Who'd a thunk it? Here I am backstage at a Crüe show and on my way to their hotel! If my friends could see me now. Miss Goody-Goody leaving with Nikki Sixx! WOO HOO! And away we go! 

But wait, my paranoia returns as I have a million things run through my head again... "How are we getting there? In a limo? In a shuttle van? What about my car? Are there seatbelts in the limo? What if we get in a wreck? Because I can just see my Daddy hearing that his little girl was found dead in Nikki Sixx's lap crushed in a limo." I didn't say a thing but I must have turned pale as a ghost because Nikki asked, "What is it?" I didn't want to look like the dweeb that I was, so I just blurted out, "I'm not leaving my car here. I’ll drive to the hotel so I can leave when I want!" and Nikki said, "I'm not holding you hostage. You can leave any time you want, but I doubt you'll want to!"

So here I am in my car thinking, "I need a paper bag to breathe in. I'm gonna faint, or puke or SOMETHING!" LOL! Now, we've all heard of Elvis Presley having his ‘Memphis Mafia’ and the same was true for the Crüe. They travelled with an entourage of people. Some were here because Mötley Crüe wanted THEM there and others were there because THEY wanted to be near Mötley Crüe. There were people that the Crüe wanted around and there were ‘wannabes’ who tried desperately to get a taste of the life the Crüe led. Regardless of how and why they were there, there was an entourage that was pure Mötley! It was so funny to see the Crüe at a 4 or 5 star hotel. It was so ironic... SO Mötley! When the entourage arrived it stuck out like a sore thumb and I felt like the WHITE sheep of the family in a flock of BLACK sheep! LOL! Mötley Crüe in a five star hotel, to me, was like a Salvador Dali painting in a Monet exhibit!

SO, who exactly parties with the Crüe? It could be anyone from sports figures, to actors, to strippers and porn stars, and everyone in between! Now, what exactly do you do with Mötley Crüe? ANYTHING YOU DAMN WELL PLEASE! Do you want women? There's plenty of that to go around with names like E. Norma Stits! Do you want drugs? Alcohol? Then Shoney's ‘All you can eat’ breakfast bar doesn't hold a candle to this! If you've ever been to Mardi Gras in New Orleans (the only place to truly celebrate Mardi Gras) then you understand the vibe!

Nikki couldn't get over the expression on my face. I had the eyes of a child meeting Mickey Mouse! Either that or a ‘deer in the headlights’ look! LOL! Nikki introduced me to person after person and I was almost numb. I am usually very good with names and hear someone's name once and remember it for life, but in this case I was really looking ‘blonde’ when I'd ask someone for the fifth time, "Now what was your name again?" I was feeling out of sorts, like this was a movie that I was an extra in and I really didn't belong here. So I kind of soaked it all in like a sponge and said, "No thank you!" a gazillion times to offers of alcohol, drugs, and then the ‘come-on’ lines! UGH!

I am normally pretty laid back and nice to people and if I'm not interested in someone, I decline gracefully, but this one dude was just relentless and I stuck to Nikki's side like glue to stay away from him and he STILL kept approaching me. I finally turned and said, "Look A$$HOLE, your princess must be in another castle!" and Nikki cracked up!

Everyone's heard that the girls favored Vince. WELL, that is an understatement! That's not to say that there weren't girls hanging around wanting Nikki, Tommy and Mick because there were girls around them too, but with Vince it was like a swarm of bees... flies on a piece of watermelon at a 4th of July picnic! LOL! I couldn't believe that girls were kissing him, I mean tongue down his throat, one after another right in front of everyone!

WELL, if THAT shocked me, then boy was I in for a surprise! I would turn around here, talk to someone there and bang - clothes were flying and dropping to the floor and I was like, "OH MY GOD!!!!! Are they doing what I THINK they're doing?" I suppose naive must be my middle name because I had HEARD that things like this happened, but SEEING it... HOLY $HIT! I had never even seen a porn flick and here I was with a ringside seat! LOL! 

I wondered, "What must it be like to have people throw themselves at you, LITERALLY?" Then I thought, "What kind of person would Mötley Crüe actually want to DATE? It would seem that it would HAVE to be someone with one hell of a personality because that's all that would set you apart from the masses when everyone was tall, blonde, tan, gorgeous, with enough silicone to bounce and enough saline implants to make the Pacific Ocean envious. So, do the guys ever get sick of ‘tits and ass?' Does it all start looking the same like 'all in a day's work' to a gynaecologist? Well apparently... NO. LOL! The Crüe was like, "BRING IT ON... FRESH MEAT!"

People are performing sex acts and I'm lost deep in thought wondering if they (the Crüe) ever got bored with it and Nikki says, "What are you thinking?" I was like, "UH... NOTHIN!" He asked if I wanted to come with him for some privacy and for some reason I didn't think, "OH MY GOD... is he gonna rape me?" like my personality usually would. I thought, "GREAT... Calgon, take me away!" So, we were alone and I felt really calm, for once in my life but I wasn't sure what to do/say so I did what I always do in that case - started blabbing like a broken record! Those of you who know me are probably laughing right now because you know that 'THAT'S ME.' LOL!

I was surprised that Nikki enjoyed my ranting and raving. He would ask questions and I'd blab more, barely coming up for air, afraid of a moment of silence. Then I started talking about Nikki's lyrics and how under-rated he was and anyone who knows Nikki knows that Nikki may have struggled with a lot of demons in the past but doubt about his work was never one of them! LOL! He responded well to the 'stroking of the ego' and we talked on and on and I told him that my take on his writing was that if Shakespeare was alive, he'd say, "I wanna meet this Nikki guy" because You're All I Need" could rival the likes of "Hamlet, Othello, Macbeth, Romeo..." as one of the great 'Tragedies.' With all of that said, Nikki was ’all ears’ and asked how a 17 year old could possibly know so much about life? I told him that my Great-Granny taught me when I was barely walking, that the key to life is to ‘LIVE" and not merely ‘EXIST’ and that I LIVED every day. So I figured that I had packed in about 80 years of wisdom in my 17 years of life.

He opened his arms and said, "You're really something" and I gave him a hug. All of a sudden I felt like a pit bull and didn't want to let go. I had a rush of pleasure I had never felt before and all of a sudden thought, "What the hell... so what if my clothes drop like leaves in the fall. I've got to lose my virginity SOME time. I can't think of a better way than NIKKI!" Then it was like that scene in Animal House with the devil and angel on my shoulder... "Do it", "Oh no you don't", "YES", "NO"... and I came to the conclusion all of a sudden that this WAS the first time I had been alone with Nikki. I can't let him think I'm just like those ‘other’ girls who fall at his feet. I can't give in...YET!

Well, Nikki broke the silence and the ice by saying, "Are you packing heat?" I was like "HUH?" He said, "You know... I didn't notice that you had big... well... that..." and I said "OH, my big tits?" LOL! I explained that I took ballet, tap, jazz, gymnastics, and was a cheerleader and that I didn't want to 'jiggle' AND that I didn't want guys at my school to look at me for THAT reason so I always wore those minimizer, sports, support bras to 'hold things in place' and he said, "You shouldn't... that's YOU!"

All of a sudden I realized what time it was and thought, "OH $HIT... I have to go... NOW!" and Nikki said, "What? NOW?" and I said, "Yeah, you see... I AM still in school and I snuck away to be here and I have commitments... school, football games, cheerleading, Key Club...yada yada yada... not to mention my Daddy who's SOOO STRICT!" Nikki said, "So, is this it? Or will I see you again?" and I said, "You'll see me... soon. I just have to go home NOW" and Nikki asked if I wanted tickets/passes for next time and I said, "NO, I already bought my ticket but you could tell me who to talk to in order to ‘get to you’ next time and he said, "COOL." I grabbed him and hugged him and said, "Bye" and ran off like Cinderella afraid her coach was about to turn into a pumpkin.

So, I DID spend the night with Nikki... just NOT in the original way I had planned! I thought it worked out pretty well though... that out of all of the people hanging around, that Nikki wanted to see ME again! I was ahead of the game... already knew what shows I was going to and when I'd see Nikki again. I wondered on the way home, "What about Vanity? Is she still engaged to Nikki? If she's there next time will she kick my A$$? Will he ignore me if she's around? Will he act like he doesn't know me? Tell me to get lost? How soon is too soon to have sex with someone and NOT have them think you're a slut? Second encounter? Third? Should I attack Nikki next time?"

You see, I didn't want to play ‘hard-to-get.’ I wasn't into games... the REAL me was a lady who wouldn't have sex without an engagement ring on my finger but the OTHER me that Nikki brought out was like "Where the hell did YOU come from?" I couldn't wait to TASTE Nikki! Next Month, I really get to KNOW Nikki Sixx!

Next month, Chapter 4 - The Circus & The Cave 
See you there, 

Angel Aderhold

Previous: Chapter 2

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